tedgresham's blog: "Bohemian Bull"

OK, so I went to bed.  My damn back / shoulder whateverthefuck it is flared up and besides, my brain would not shut up so I just got up again.  Damn, another night with four hours' sleep.  Oh well.

I got up to work on my website, the one YOU should visit if you are a Texan and a fan of hard rock/heavy metal music, just to see how many bands are listed and tell me about your fav's in Texas that I don't have on the list. 

I also had an idea bout a blog to piss religious people off.  Except I talked myself out of it.  Hell, most people are religious, why piss them all off?  Even I have my  Buddha riding on the dash of my van!  But then, well, I saw that goddamn annoying word: blessed.  Everything came back. 

Before I begin let me provide a teensy disclaimer.  I am a disgruntled, angry and frustrated ex-Christian.  I'm pissed at myself for throwing away a goddamn half century sunk in a morass of religious bullshit.  Well, almost half century.  Whatever.  ...excuse me, I just realized my headphones were still on my head but the music stopped....  So, anyway, I am stuck in the most Bible-belted goddamn town ever to fill up space on this earth.  Or so it seems.  Religious talk/icons/attitudes are making me Nucking Futz!

So, that word: blessed.  What does it mean?  It means this god guy swooped down and flung a wand or something and touched all these people and forced them to become friends with person A.   What?  Fuck that.  I don't want to be shoved into someone's friendship lane by anybody, much less a deity who's absent when all the big shit hits the fan--and the little shit too, btw.  Why not just say, "I have lots of friends who seem to like me and vice versa and that's damned good!"   But Noooooo, it's "blessed."  bullshit.  I've been "blessed" with friends before and got fucked by them... and not in a good way, either.

People are always tossing that goddamn word around: "bless this, bless that...." according to whose idea of blessing?  Bless the beasts and the children?  Do we want them happy or fried up with potatoes?  The beasts, that is, of course.  And the children?  Do we want them stupid and warped by religious dogma or free to be fucked up wack brained motherfuckers-of-the-year like me if they choose?  Hmm, I bet the god guy will not choose the latter.  Too bad, it leaves out all the good music!

Well Godsmack'm.  Really!  One of my favorite bands, of course.  "Bad Religion":  Oh, its a bad religion, From a broken nation.  Its a contradiction,  And I cant take it anymore, yeah.  (Like there's any goddamn choice around here.)  Can you feel it? I gotta live with it everyday And I cant take the pressure. Im goin' insane, Now go away!

So hey, you know, I play nice around my mawinlaw and my extremist religious brother to keep the peace but I fucking don't have to play nice all the time and I do Not want to have to play nice around so-called friends.  Pray for me if you want, dear sweet misguided person (I'm sure my bro' wears out his carpet over me) but please don't expect me to convert and for fuck sake do not befriend me if  you can't take a Godsmack kind'of attitude and deal with so-called "expletives" like, well fuck, you know, shit, stuff like goddamn and hell and all that goddamn fucking shit.

Be my friend.  I'd like that.  Hell, I'd like a real friend, even a few, to knock elbows with over beer as the music falls hard and loud on our ears.  Not the cyber beer shit but the real stuff in a real bar with real music.  But don't say you're blessed for me to be  your fucking friend because that's such bullshit.  I am NOT a blessing.  No fucking way.  I am funny sometimes, silly and totally wacked usually, I can even be kind and gentle and shit.  But I will not be a goddamn blessing.  Got that?

So ok then.  Maybe I can sleep now.  Maybe not.  I fucking painted myself into a corner, see, I went and grew a business face on Myspace and Facebook so I can't fucking rant there any more.  You people are stuck with me.  Or not.  Whatever.  So shit, there has to be somebody out there in lah lah land who is not totally fucking offended by my little late nite rant thingy.  Write me.  Let's be friends!  Don't you think that would be the most goddamned blessing ever?  HA HA HA!

Good night all you fucked up crazy people all across Texas and the world!