XaviRoseMaiden's blog: "More Writing"

September 18^th ,

It would have been your birthday again , I would celebrate it .. but your no longer here …

Instead your my angel , my butterfly … all I have left of you is my memories ,

 Sweet precious memories ..

 We were so close , before you were taken away by the sands of time..

I miss you , like it was yesterday sometimes ..

I remember begging just to have back .. you were always the one .. to dry my eyes from crying ..

To tell me everything would be alright …

The day I said bye to you .. was I thought the hardest day of my life …

Mum I miss you …

I miss your smile ..

I miss your sense of humor..

I miss you not being there to see , what’s become of me ..

I miss you so much it breaks my heart if it let it..

I miss you so much … you were so amazing …

I love you Mum … if I could it say it thousand times more gosh it would feel great ..

We had our fights , we had our struggles ..

 But were always there , u always cared …

Why is it , that after so long …

That when I think of you .. I still cry ..

 Like the day you died ..

 Why is it that when I think how much I miss .. feel the emptiness of where in my heart were you .. were ..

But now your free sprit is free ..

I love you so much…

Love always your Daughter , now and forever xoxoxoxoxoxxox

Beauty of the soul ... 

Sometimes we given a special gift of time with someone.. 

yesterday i had the priviledge of hanging out my mentor and her mentor , being her sister... 

and i was so honoured to meet her , and spend time getting to know her.. 

and i asked for special permission to take a flower from her garden ... 

this flower is so beautiful .. 

and know what at the bottom of it there is a star... 

i took a picture of it ... 

just to show you all .. 

theres a star deep down inside of you .. 

its not all about our egos ... 

 but is bout the bottom of souls , just like this flower .. 

our souls go through so much , but the beauty of them never changes .. at the bottom .. the top layers be bron , or ripped , or even but underneath it all is the true soul... 

Bugle and the thunderstorm.. 

I know the storm is coming .. i can feel it in my bones ...

i am already scared... i don't want to be alone... 

i must find the safe , warm place , to hide from this terrible thunderstorm.. 

I race in quickly into my human friends room as soon she opens the door... 

I'm so scared all i can do is shake and shiver... 

iIm so scared i can't move.. at all ... 

I hate being so scared... i've been this way since i was a pup... 

I wish i didn't have to be this way i wish i could stop... 

I am so scared ... 

When will this storm end.. it seems like it will go in for ever... 

It's so loud it hurts my sensitive ears.. it makes my tail droop down.. 

The humans get mad at me when i break things because im scared ... 

but i can't stop... 

Oh i hate these thunderstorms.... 

These are the times i hate being a dog... 

The rain doesn't stop here , sometimes it rains every day... 

the grass is so wet, and its hard to find a safe place to hide ... 

that's why i run so fast to come inside ... 

and if i make it in i hide under the table,,

right by  my human ...

she tolerates me being there ... she loves me

but sometimes i try to bury myself ... 

but there is no dirt or ground ... 

i just can't bear the lound lound loud .. 

of the thunder , the lighetening terrifies me as it breaks across the sky... 

I'm so scared i think i could die... 

The human tries to console me with a soothing voice... 

Sometimes they pet me when i shiver... 

Oh i hope the storm wil be over soon .. so i relax and sleep ... 

and stop my shivering ... 

I'll feel happy again then .. 

 I'll venture out from under my safe hiding place.. 

And find something else to do .. 

Maybe my human will bring my favorite treat... 

A fresh egg on a plate .. gosh.. wouldn't that be neat... 

The storm will over soon.. i just know it... 

Serenity..

Piece of mind..

You never know how you value it till you lose it...

But once you have it back its like being in heaven..

Having a place to just be your oasis..

 To think.. To read.. To just be still for a moment.. 

To write as I'm writing now...

I am free!

Thankyou God for restoring my serenity!

I believe in true love...

The good love ...

Where you are friends that love to hangout..

And do things together...

We get told we need a man complete us from a young age but this isn't true..

We need to love ourselves first... Before we can fully love others...

The best partners I've meet give each other space to be themselves have time by themselves..

And enjoy just enjoy each others company...

They make each other laugh...

They tell each other things throught out the day

They encourage each others dreams..

But are also honest...

They propel each other in a positive way...

They argue...

They discuss

They make a habit to fight fair...

They want the best for each other...

They don't need each other too much

But they want to be there...

This is kind of love that lasts...

They are a team...

It grows as they do..

And if given the right nourishment from both partners...

It will keep growing into something so beautiful..

That words can barely fathom its depth...

You never how long it will take...

But you'll just feel it when its there...

He grabs my arms.. He pins me again harder this time.. I feel his malice... Wretched human... He whispers in my ear almost sweetly.. I hate him now.... I hate his glaring staring into me.. But there's no where to run for this moment  I'm trapped and alone with him...

He lifts  his long claw-like fingers and drags them over my skin.. Piercing it. I cry a Lil as the blood pours out.. He laughs evily... He seems pleased with himself...