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What are you waiting for?
Sometimes the hardest part is feeling at all
Forcing the teeth to seperate and the words to come
And sometimes the hardest part is biting back the words
Before they can leave the edge of your tongue
And more often than not, I will fail at both
I will hurt those I wish to help and badly so
I will hold back words I should have said
And I will watch the tears and the pain flow
I will fail those I want most to succeed
And I will be forgotten long before I am gone
I will stand in this hole I have dug myself in
And I will wait for the day that I can feel I won
I am many things inside, so confused oftentimes
Quietly torturing myself with a mind that has seen
Far too much of what should never be in this world
Between the skin and the bones and blood between
I have hunted for answers to questions I despise
I have found answers I wished to never understand
I have felt lost and alone for most of my life
And I have given up on having any sort of a plan
Because life is always changing, and still I remain
The hapless victim of a too feeling heart
A bastard of seclusion and endless empathy
And I am slowly tearing myself apart
Because I know who I am and who I want to be
And every day I look in the mirror, it's not who I see
I feel a shadow of he world I play inside of, in my head
And I hope one day, someone will play with me
I am not immortal, and every breath counts
I can not outrun whatever is after me anymore
I don't know how to fight, but I'm standing here
In my hole in the ground, in this one man war
And I feel am I losing, I just don't know what
Am I losing control or the fight, or just myself?
I don't understand anything, anymore, at all
And I can't even fight the fires of my Hell
Am I a lost wondering soul, or just a man?
Does it even matter to anyone other than myself at all?
Can one man fight the world for all that he knows to be right?
And is there even a point, when it seems there's no one to catch him if he falls?
There is a child inside, and he feels so much
He wants so much, and I don't know what to do
Desperate for the softest hand, and a loving touch
And so far, the hands of myself have had to make do
And still, despite the fact that I have left my soul lying broken on the floor
Still I find life in those eyes, and still I find that I long for so much more
