......
Macho man married a typical good-looking lady, and after the
wedding, he laid down the following rules:
"I'll be home when I want, if I want and at what time I want,and I
don't
expect any hassle from you.I expect a great dinner to be on the table
unless I tell you that I won't be home for dinner.I'll go
hunting,fishing,boozing and card-playing when I want with my old
buddies
and don't you give me a hard time about it.Those are my rules.Any
comments?"
His new bride said,"No,that's fine with me.Just understand that
there will be sex here at seven o'clock every night... whether
you're here or not."
( SHE'S GOOD!)
Marriage (Part II)
Husband and wife had a bitter quarrel on the day of their 40th
wedding anniversary!
The husband yells,"When you die,I'm getting you a headstone that
reads,'Here Lies My Wife - Cold As Ever.'
"Yeah?"she replies."When you die,I'm getting you a headstone
that reads,"Here Lies My Husband Stiff At Last.'"
(HE ASKED FOR IT!)
Marriage (Part III)
Husband (a doctor) and his wife are having a fight at the
breakfast table.
Husband gets up in a rage and says,"And you are no good in bed
either,"and
storms out of the house.
After sometime he realizes he was nasty and decides to make amends and
rings her up.
She comes to the phone after many rings, and the irritated
husband says,"what took you so long to answer the phone?"
She says,"I was in bed."
"In bed this early,doing what?"
"Getting a second opinion!"
(YEP, HE HAD THAT COMING,TOO!)
Marriage (Part IV)
A man has six children and is very proud of his achievement. He is so
proud
of himself,that he starts calling his wife,"Mother of Six" in spite of
her
objections.
One night,they go to a party.....
The man decides that it's time to go home and wants to find out if his
wife
is ready to leave as well.
He shouts at the top of his voice,"Shall we go home 'Mother of six?"
His wife,irritated by her husband's lack of discretion shouts
right back,"Anytime you're ready,Father of Four."
(RIGHT ON, LADY!)
God may have created man before woman,but there
is always a rough draft before the masterpiece.
SEND THIS TO SMART WOMEN WHO NEED A LAUGH AND TO MEN YOU THINK CAN
HANDLE
IT
