Can you hold this please?
Dont fold it, it needs to be straight to hold the breeze.
The moments pass and days dont last.
Not long enough for me to get a grasp
on all the thoughts and feelings that have my head hashed.
Im bracing for the impact,
And hoping I'll stay intact, but
I know that once its done we cant take it back, so
I write my personal to keep it on track.
But the roads been covered now how am I to find my way?
Today Im lost hung over and frayed.
It's the edges of my soul.
Please tell me you know how to braid.
See I need help this waters too deep to wade.
Can you tie me back together and make me feel okay?
Would you fly me through the weather and make this jack ass and ace?
Could you give me 90 days notice and hold this heart securely as a deposit?
Please dont fold it.
I'll pay you when I pick up the pieces and get emboldened.
Can you hold this please?
Dont fold it, it needs to be straight to hold the breeze.
This is to the son that I may never meet.
I'm sorry, tears flow from my eyes and I am far from at peace.
I hope your soul returns and I hope its to me.
Know that my heart and soul burn and I am but cinders of a fallen tree.
I'm at siege from self hatred unabated and it flows through me.
This is the greatest heartbreak that could ever be.
Know that before your mother I never even wanted to breed,
But she changed my thoughts and my heart grew from a weed to a tree.
And I am cut now
more deeply than I have ever conceived
I want to shut down
This pain has permeated me
My knees hit the ground
consistently in fetal positions
Just like the day she cut you out.
Vaccuum aspiration is the lable they gave it.
Litereally it means to pull you from your purchase as we made it.
So now im riddled, a beast, and dont know if I can take this.
Fuck all I do is get wasted
I'm'a'break kid
Got the means to go to sleep and never wake again.
But thats the wrong way I still have fam and friends.
All I really know is that I hope I see you again before the end.
I love you.
Can you hold this please?
Dont fold it it needs to be straight to hold the breeze.
It;s done, locked.
The shock is so heavy I'm a zombie but still walk.
I cant get through my walls they're too thick and I cant talk.
Stop.
See my heart is a shattered block.
My splintered thoughts are already in winter.
A knought in my gut is tied with iron wrought.
Its brought out in me
My souls been shot .
It spouts out the bleeding hot shroud protecting me from inspecting my feelings.
And Im still not seeing clearly.
With a sick sense just breathing I can almost hear me start to laugh.
It takes me back to as a child
Laughing maniacally
taking a grown mans hand.
I laughed then but not this time Im just frozen and I stand.
