And there he sat, stone rolled back, and an angel sat upon the floor and there in the corner lay the wrapings neatly rolled in the corner. Upon entering the tomb, the woman bowed down. and the angel said unto her.
"Woman, Peter Cottontail doesn't work this side of town."
The woman raised her eyes and looked upon the angel. "But how can this be, as I do not know the touch of credit cards. I am but a handmaiden and yet, with the right marketing even this lame spiritual occasion could take off..."
And the angel was delighted and joined by a heavenly host and they chimed as one... " Only with the power of Macy's"
And then it was as if the earth did open and from it i ssued children and they tossed into the pit the chocolate bunnies of their parents and bellowed forth for the nifty technological devices of today. And the stores saw that they made money and that it was good and the parents smiled for they had what their forefathers had not, another day to spend cash.
And somewhere, lost in the past, some poor fucker died nailed to a couple of 2 x 4s because he said things would be better if we forgot hate and got along...