U KNOW IN A MONTHS TIME.. I NEVER THOUGHT I WOULD BE HERE.. FOR SO LONG I WAS A GOOD GF AND WIFE TO MY X.. I MEAN THE FUCKER WAS TREATED WELL.. I KNOW HE WOULD CHEAT ON ME AND I STILL WAS THE GOOD GF, THEN THE GOOD WIFE..TRYED TO BE AS PERFECT AS I COULD BE FOR HIM.. I LEARNED SLOWLY THAT I WAS JUST NOT GOOD ENOUGH.. NEVER HAD A GOOD MAN BEFORE.. I WAS THE GOOD GIRL THAT JUST GOT THE BAD BOYZ.. SUCKS TOO.. CAUSE ITS MESSED ME UP.. MY VIEWS ON RELATIONSHIPS, LOVE, LIFE WITH SOME ONE, AND TOUGHT ME NOT TO TRUST WELL.. THERE ARE TIMES WHEN IM ALONE I LOOK AT MY SELF.. AN START TO TRY AND SEE IF ITS MY BODY THAT MAKES MEN WANT OTHER GIRLS.. I MEAN I HAVE SOME TRICKS THAT ROCK.. IM TOLD IM GREAT IN BED.. SO I KNOW ITS NOT THAT.. SO MAYBE ITS MY LOOKS.. MAYBE IM JUST NOT PRETTY ENOUGH TO STAND BY IN PUBLIC.. CAUSE I KNOW IM A LOVING PERSON. VERY CARING.. I GIVE MY ALL TO SOME ONE I LOVE.. ITS HOW I AM.. SO SEE IT HAS TO BE LOOKS.. I MEAN IM NOT THE BEST LOOKIN THING TO LOOK AT.. I MEAN U ALL SEE MY PICS I TAKE.. I TAKING GREAT PICS.. BUT THERE JUST PICS.. THEY ALWAYS FIND THE SMALLER, YOUNGER, SMARTER, MORE NOT ME GIRLS.. LIKE MY X AND HIS LAST FLING.. I MEAN HE SAYS IT WAS NOT ONE.. BUT NOT WHAT I SAW, HEARED, WAS TOLD, AND THEN SOME.. SHE WAS YOUNGER, IN THE ARMY, SMALLER, I DONT THINK SHE WAS THE GREATEST THING TO LOOK AT, BUT IM NOT HIM.. AN THERE I WAS WITH OUR SECOND CHILD.. PREGNATE AND ALONE WITH MY OLDEST SON.. WHILE HE LIVED OVER AT HER MOMS FOR MONTHS.. NO MATTER WHAT I DO.. I MESS THINGS UP.. SEE 5 YEARS AGO.. I GOT SICK OF THE GOOD GIRL SHIT.. KEEPIN MY MOUTH SHUT.. SO I TOLD HIM WHAT I THOUGHT.. THEN I JUST SAID FUCK IT. AN I WOULD GO OUT AND HANG OUT ALL NITE.. JUST TO MAKE HIM GET THAT IF HE DOES NOT STOP IM GONE.. AN I WILL BE FIND WITH OUT HIM.. SO HE ALWAYS THOUGHT I WAS CHEATING.. BUT I WAS NOT.. NOT TILL I SAID IT WAS OVER IN MY HEAD.. CAUSE 2 YEARS AGO. I HAD ENOUGH PAIN BY THIS MAN.. AN U KNOW WHEN I TOLD HIM ITS OVER A 2 MONTHS AGO. U KNOW HE KEEP WANTING ME TO STAY WITH HIM A WORK IT OUT.. AN ALL I COULD THINK OF WAS WHAT A FUCKIN FOOL DO U TAKE ME FOR.. AN NOW HERE I AM HURT SO BAD THAT I DOUT MY SELF.. I LOOK IN THE MIRROW AND SEE HOW HE DAMAGED ME..HOW ALL THE GUYS HAVE DAMAGED ME.THEY MADE ME THINK IM NOT WORTH ANY ONE.. AN I FEEL IM NOT.. U CAN TELL ME IM THE BEST IN THE WORLD AND IT WONT GO ALL THE WAY IN MY HEAD.. AN I DONT THINK IT WILL CHANGE.. I HAVE BEEN TOLD IM NOTHING FOR SO LONG.. THAT WHEN SOME ONE SAYS IT NOW.. I TEAR UP CAUSE I WISH I COULD SEE WHAT THEY SEE.. AN HERE I AM WISHING I COULD HAVE A GOOD MAN TO LOVE ME SO I CAN BE GOOD TO HIM.. CAUSE IM THAT PERSON THAT DOES NEED SOME ONE IN HER LIFE.. I FEED OF PPL.. AN WHEN IM HAPPY WITH SOME ONE OR IN LOVE.. IM MORE HAPPER.. I REALLY AM.. ITS SAD I KNOW.. AN I DONT NEED ANY ONE.. THAT WHAT UR THINKING.. BUT I HAVE ALOT OF LOVE I NEED TO USE.. CAUSE I FEEL LESS OF MY SELF NOT GIVING THAT TO SOME ONE.. SAD I GUESS. BUT ITS HOW I FEEL.. U KNOW I KISSED MY X HUSBAND ON JULY 5TH. UNDER A TREE AND I KNOW I WOULD LOVE HIM FOR EVER.. AN I DO STILL LOVE HIM.. THERE IS SO MUCH PAIN THAT I CANT LOVE HIM LIKE I DID.. AN ITS BEEN 10 YEARS.. AN IN THAT 10 YEARS.. I LOVED HIM WITH MY FUL HEART.. AN WHAT SUCKS IS.. I FELL AGAIN.. AN CANT EVEN HAVE THIS PERSON.. HE MAKES ME FEEL BETTER ABOUT MY SELF.. AN THATS A GOOD THING.. I JUST HOPE THAT LIKE THAT TESLA SOMG.. LOVE WILL FIND AWAY BACK TO U, I KNOW..
I KNOW ONE DAY I WILL HAVE MY GOOD MAN.. HAVE TO RIGHT? ANY WAYS.. I KNOW U CAN SEE HOW RANDOM I AM.. SORRY ABOUT THAT.. JUST ALOT RUNING AROUND AND ITS DRIVIN ME NUTS..
HAVE A GOOD ONE
