To my regular readers, I must apologize to you for this but I'm going to speak my mind here and straighten a "friend" out real quick like. I'm really angry and I need to vent.
First of all if you read my profile, you would have read that I am a 100% INDEPENDANT NATIVE TEXAN WOMAN. I shoot straight from the hip and I tell it like it is with me. If you have never dealth with a Texas woman, I can tell you it's a whole different ballgame.
Being from ________, you don't know what that means so I'm going to explain so you understand what that means to me. IT means:
I answer to NO ONE except the person that is paying my bills. As a child, I took direction from my parents or their designated authority care giver. At the age of 18, I became my own person and therefore only allowed direction with someone who was clearly someone I paid to educate me or a judicial entity.
Thus, my first husband tried to beat me when I refused to conform to his control. He belittled me, kept me a hostage in my own home, stalked me, harrassed me, bent and broke a stainless steal knife in half as an example of his strength, threatened me with a gun, and financially ruined me. NEVER AGAIN will I allow someone to touch me without my consent and if you do, I will hurt you badly.
Mentally, emotionally, physically or monetarily, you will feel my wrath! It may not be today, tomorrow, or five years from now but you will feel it. My first husband felt it just 2 days before our son's 8th birthday when his parental rights were removed and the judge ordered him to pay $16,000.00 in back child support without being able to see or call that child his any longer.
With that being said, let me restate who is allowed to tell me what to do; my direct line supervisors at work, anyone that I have a negotiated contract with, persons upholding the law set up by the United States Government. NO OTHER PERSON has the power to control me or express their will over me unless I feel they are WORTHY to do so.
Now, I am willing to listen to other people's opinions when I ask for them. I do not mind people giving me constructive criticism however, I WILL NOT TOLERATE someone being condescending to me and acting as if I don't have the sense enough to poor piss out of a boot with the instructions on the heel!
What brought all of this on? I got a phone call tonight from a person who has "interest" in me and when I started to talk about talking to my lover and how he brought my spirits up, the person started telling me how concerned he was for my safety and telling me I should do this and that,etc...like I'm some stupid blonde that doesn't know any better or screws any person that thought about me.
If that were the case with me, I would have been with well over 20,000 men and women that thought enough of me to check me out, drop me a line or send me an e-mail!!! That's right! My profile on Myspace has been viewed over 20,000 times as well as this one that has been viewed 5,000 times just since I signed on in October! There are people from all over the world that have checked me out.
And just because I allowed YOU to have my phone number does not mean you have a line to my bedroom either. It just meant that I found you interesting enough to talk to offline. Even if you made it to the point of actually meeting me in person, that still does not put you in line of being in my bed!
I go through a rigorous screening process for anyone that is allowed in my bed! The lover that you questioned me about waited FOUR(4) YEARS to sleep with me. I'm not saying that every that I have an interest in has to wait that long but, I don't just sleep with someone that I don't know well!
Do not ever interrupt me when I am trying to explain something to you and try to finish my sentence with what YOU think is the ending. You were very smart for feeling that the phone call needed to be ended because I was really holding back my anger toward you. If you feel that you want to take yourself off of my friends list as a result of this blog, please do so. I have already removed you from my family list.
Granted, when I get excited and/or nervous I do tend to get long winded but surely you should have picked up somewhere in our conversations that I was not stupid! If I needed to know options on what I should do or education on the said topic of conversation, I would have said, "Gosh! I really don't know what I should do here." Did you hear me say that? Did you hear me say anything in our conversation that would say that I felt any concern? NO! YOUR mind went into how it MAY EFFECT YOU if something wasn't said. I have never gave any indication that I WOULD ever meet you somewhere down the line. In fact, I have been very, very clear that I may not ever meet you haven't I? Just because YOU WANT it to happen, doesn't mean it will!
OK, now for the rest of you that might be still reading this, the reason that I posted this in my blogs instead of writing this person an e-mail is simply that I have had a similar type situation happen almost every single month with various people. It is very frustrating to have to repeat myself over and over again.
The Goddess has spoken!!
