No, I don't feel like having separate blogs for separate levels of my bullshit. Carry on!
If I were a month, I’d be September. In a state that actually celebrates autumn.
If I were a day of the week, I’d be Sunday. A very lazy one.
If I were a time of day, I'd be the moment where I wake up and my body actually isn't begging for me to go back to sleep.
If I were a planet, I’d be Earth. I do things I know might eventually kill me, but I bet I look alright from space.
If I were a sea animal, I’d be an anemone. I just like to say it. Anemone.
If I were a direction, I’d be a little to the left.
If I were a piece of furniture, I’d be a lamp. I can shine if I need to.
If I were a liquid, I’d be ice cold.
If I were a gemstone, I’d be amber is the color of your energy.
If I were a tree, I’d be a birch. That's not a typo.
If I were a flower, I’d be a petunia aspiring to be a calla lily.
If I were a kind of weather, I'd be a silver-lined cloudy day with random increments of sunshine and sprinkling rain. ZOMG RAINBOWS!
If I were a musical instrument, I’d be a grand piano.
If I were a color, I’d be a shade of blue.
If I were an emotion, I’d be stable.
If I were a fruit, I’d be a watermelon. Juicy and seedless.
If I were a sound, I’d be an irregular heartbeat.
If I were an element, I’d be iocane powder.
If I were a car, I’d be a 1967 Chevy Impala like the one the Winchester boys drive. *humps tv screen*
If I were a scent, I’d be of a woman.
If I were a body part, I’d be a mouth.
If I were a facial expression, I’d be a crooked smile.
If I were a pair of shoes, I’d be a cheap pair of flip flops. I want sand on my toes.