I don't know how to start. I don't really know what to say. I want to scream and cry! But neither will solve anything. I can't believe it's come to this. I did all I could. So instead, I'm angry. I'm angry at myself for thinking that I could win. I'm angry for being the fool yet again! I thought I saw something in myself, I thought I saw something in all of this. I was wrong. I don't know if I'll ever trust again, I was stupid to take the walls down. I've opened up entirely, and it's all been thrown back into my face. I gave everything I could, I bent over backward. I let things out that have been locked tightly inside me for ages, and for what? Just to bleed all over again! To be laughed at and mocked! I've poured myself into the hands of fate, and being the evil bitch that she is, she's once again shown me that the truth is, I can never be complete. I've lost the will, and truth be told, once I can regain my footing, I won't repeat the same mistake. Rest assured that I've learned a valuable lesson. That lesson is that the only people I need in my life are those who want me to be in theirs. I'll no longer be the person I was, I'll not be used and tossed to the side like trash again. I won't turn my back on anyone, but I won't be the same open, giving, loving Adriane any longer. I'll be here for you when things fall apart for you, I'll do what I can to pick you up and fix what's been broken, because no matter what I feel or what I want to do, that will always be a part of me. And things will fall apart. They always do. But from here on in you're going to have to prove to me that you want me in your life, that no matter what happens I can trust you. You're going to have to prove to me that regardless of what others say, think, or try to do the bonds of our friendship will not be broken.
