Soul of the Creator's blog: "It's how I feel right now"

The pain..
It comes in waves..
Each one is as if my insides were being torn and twisted around.
My eyes well up with tears.  I become blind.
I try to scream, but I realize I'm not breathing.
There is this cold shroud over me.
There's nothing but blackness on my mind.
Is it seething hate? Is it anger?
Do I succumb to the will that is not mine?
I'm dying inside.
There's a pit in my soul that's nearly all but eaten me away.
The hand of Fate cannot be forced this time.
I'm broken.
I'm beaten.
I've run out of will to live.