so sick and tired of it....tired of bn alone....tired of not having that someone who you can cuddle and hold when im down and out.....why must it be me??...is it couse i treated girls badly in my past??...if so i swear that i have changed my ways.....i know how it feels for a women to be hurt by a guy bcouse ive lost someone that ment alot to me and now i feel like and ass for all the stupid shit ive done in my past......i guess when they say wat goes around comes around is true...karma.........but i swear im not that way anymore...well you know most people say that they will cry you a river to show there love or walk the earth to prove they love you...well you know why they say that???.....bcouse love is an unxplainable thing..but that is what i want right now....the feeling of that unxplainable love...its nothing better then that feeling..it is so hard for me to find a nice women out here bcouse people put my name out like im a pimp or whatnot but im not....alot of my hommies are girls and just couse i hang out with them dont mean we are together......i do have friends that are girls you know...but now people look to me as a pimp...player..asshole...dick..etc etc just couse of wat they heard....i only been with four girls my whole life and my first was for seven years...8-15 years old...now thats the love i want again...i want it to last years...i really try not to think about this much but it just happins to come back to mind...the only way to erase this from my head is to find that love.....the love.....that i dont have now..........................12:10am , july 11 "06"
