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C J's blog: "* ~ * LEAP * ~ *"

created on 10/20/2008  |  http://fubar.com/leap/b253526

Cluster Fucked?!

Tumbling... Falling into an Abyss of complete confusion. Thoughts are lost and unable to make out whats said so clearly... Past... Present... Leaves nothing for me but a wall... Cant climb it... or go throw it... And diggin under everything, that's been build up into MY wall... I'd be crushed! Running no longer gets me anywhere fast... More and more obstacles come before me... I, dodge and wave missing them barely... Only to be slowed down more... Sinking into a reality that I cant face... Have I ever been able to face it... I doubt it! Scared of the painful, excruciating dread that will come when I hit that wall of reality... Wishing all could be just as the fairy tale stories once read as a kid... With the hurt comes heart filled suffering... Once been through this fact of life... All had changed within my very soul... Taking in, what I once could not... Stronger spirted, yet cautious of those whom I let near... Being that naive, gullible and so empty minded to believe every word spoken... Lessons learned, just to be learning more... Life seems as though an endless amount of mistakes learned... Is that really all our life is made of? Understanding the occasional burst of happiness... To be taken away by more pain and lessons learned... I know, by now I sound sour and bitter... And maybe this endless ranting is getting old... However, ever so my thoughts continue on... So for the audience reading... I suppose this meeting is adjourned...
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