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Harry was silent all the way back to Privet Drive. He found it better to stay silent since his thoughts were roiling at the moment, between Dumbledore, his friends, Ginny, and the Dursleys. Sitting next to Dudley was no help as Dudley took up most of the back seat. He shifted once and felt the locket against his leg, which just added another thought to the mental train wreck in his brain.
Why did that git Snape kill Dumbledore? Dumbledore trusted Snape and was betrayed!
Hermione’s right, we need to stick together, but I’m scared! I don’t want any more family to die!
You prat, that’s why you’re in this car, even though you’d rather be going to the Burrow!
“This will have to do you until the end of the month.”
What will these people do to me next?
Who is R.A.B.???
Now THAT was some kiss!
“We’re here,” Vernon grunted, the first thing he said all the way home, and only then did Harry realize the car had been silent the whole trip.
Harry looked up and saw Hedwig sitting on the ridgepole of Number 4, waiting. He also saw something else next to her, a slight shimmering that on the ground would have normally been mistaken for heat rising off pavement, but not on a roof. Then he remembered that the roof was inside the protective enchantments of the property. He relaxed some. The Order is watching me, not Death Eaters, he thought. He dragged his trunk and Hedwig’s cage inside and started to go up the stairs to his room. Petunia stopped him. “We need to talk, alone,” she said quietly so Vernon couldn’t hear. Harry looked at her, surprised.
“Later, OK?” Harry asked. “Right now I need rest, and Uncle Vernon and Dudley are still here.”
“All right, Harry. I think I can get them out of the house tomorrow. Just follow my lead for now, please,” she whispered. She then raised her voice so that the others could hear. “Get that trunk up the stairs and into your room, then get down here and get dinner started! No, on second thought, stay up there until dinner!” She stalked off to the kitchen.
What was THAT all about?
Harry dumped the trunk in his room and opened the window to let Hedwig in. She flew to her perch and landed with a hoot. Harry flopped on the bed, thinking. He didn’t notice the slightly shimmering shape that slipped in the open window and take a seat in the desk chair. Exhausted, Harry fell off to sleep almost immediately, while the disillusioned Tonks kept watch. She pulled out her coin and whispered “Remus”. His face appeared.
“All right, Tonks?” he inquired.
“Yep, Harry’s fast asleep, no problems getting here,” she replied.
“Talk to him when he wakes up, especially about Ginny,” he said.
“Will do. When will Minerva be here?”
“Two days, but Kingsley and Charlie will be on the outside keeping watch as well. Hermione’s parents are packing and we’ll have them in Argentina tomorrow.”
“All right, see you later, Moony.” She pocketed the coin.
An hour later the door opened and Petunia walked in. She noticed Harry asleep and she covered him with a blanket, and moved his glasses to the nightstand. She didn’t bother leaving him any food, since he was asleep anyway. Tears filled her eyes as she whispered, “Sleep well, Harry, and I’m sorry.” She closed the door behind her, leaving the sleeping Harry and the wide-eyed Tonks wondering what that was about.
Tonks thought hard and it came to her: Ginny must have made one Hell of an impact on Petunia for her to act like this, she thought. Remus is right, I will talk to him about here once he wakes up.
* * *
July 17th
Harry woke up the next morning to find the room blurry. His hand went to his face and found his glasses missing! He groped around and found them on his nightstand and put them on. How did they get there? he wondered. And when did I get tucked in, and where’s Hedwig? Harry looked around and saw nothing else amiss. Then a voice from nowhere made him jump out of his skin.
“Wotcher, Harry!”
Harry spun around, wand out, only to see Tonks, her disillusionment charm dropping, so it looked like she had stepped through a waterfall. “Tonks, don’t DO that!”
“Sorry Harry, I didn’t mean to startle you. Sleep well?” asked the witch with the bubble-gum hair.
“Yeah, pretty good, considering. What time is it, and where’s Hedwig?”
“She went out at dawn, dunno where, and it’s about 8:30. You’ve been asleep 14 hours. You were exhausted.”
“Oh, OK. By the way, I saw you sitting on the ridgepole when we came in. You looked all shimmery, like road heat, but that looked odd up on the roof.” Harry watched Tonks gape at him.
“I’ll have to work on that. My placement gave me a great view of everything, but I never thought you’d see me,” replied Tonks, surprised that he could see her disillusionment. I’ll have to let Remus know about that.
Harry looked at her timidly. “Thanks for tucking me in, I guess.”
Tonks looked away. “Uh, Harry, that wasn’t me. Petunia came in after you fell asleep, saw you, put up your blanket, put your glasses on the nightstand, and then told you to sleep well.” Tonks paused. “She also said…”
“What?”
“She said she was sorry,” finished Tonks.
Harry started for a moment, and then stopped, frowning in thought. “She said she wanted to talk to me when Uncle Vernon and Dudley were out of the house, and to follow her lead, but then she fell back into her old self. I think she’s putting on an act for their benefit.”
Just then they heard the garage door go up and the car start. They moved to the window and saw Vernon and Dursley leave. Harry turned to Tonks. “Look, disillusion yourself again. I want you to sit in on this ‘talk’, whatever it is, just to be sure. I may need some trusted feminine intuition on it later.”
She smiled. “You trust me like that?” she asked.
Harry looked at her. “Tonks, you’re about as close to as a big sister I ever had, and right now I need that, on a lot of things. Besides, you’re supposed to protect me, and I think in that regard you may want to be in the room.”
She blinked at him, eyes tearing up. “Harry, that’s so sweet, I never thought of it that way! Now you realize that as a ‘big sister’ I can be a little hard on you,” she grinned mischievously.
“Yeah, but believe me, you’ve got nothing on Hermione or Ginny,” he said, grinning back at her.
They heard steps on the stairs. “Harry, are you up yet?” Petunia called.
“Just a minute, Aunt Petunia, I need to dress,” Harry called back. Tonks quickly conjured a stool under Hedwig’s perch in the corner, and then disillusioned both herself and the stool. Harry quickly got dressed, and that distraction allowed Tonks to activate her coin and whisper, “Remus”. He appeared, but she shushed him as Harry went to open his door.
“I’m here Harry, and we’ll talk afterwards,” said her disillusioned voice.
Harry opened the door to find Petunia holding a tray of food. He stepped aside to let her in. “Thank you, Aunt Petunia,” he said. She set the tray down on the desk next to Tonks’ stool. Petunia turned to Harry, and when she did, Tonks snuck two sausage links. Harry noticed but kept a straight face.
Petunia looked at him and said, “Eat first, then we’ll talk. Vernon and Dudley are at the racetrack until dinner, so we have plenty of time.” Not needing any more encouragement, Harry sat at the desk and tucked in, and realizing how hungry he was after not having eaten anything in almost two days, put it all down.
* * *
At Grimmauld place, Lupin quickly got up, cast a Silencing charm on the coin, went to the Floo, and asked Molly to see Ginny. Ginny popped through the Floo, puzzled.
“We’re going to do some eavesdropping. Please tell no one, and stay quiet,” Lupin told her. Wide-eyed, she nodded. They move to the table and he removed the charm.
* * *
Finished, Harry turned around and saw Petunia sitting on the bed, watching him.
“That was delicious, Aunt Petunia, thank you. And thanks for tucking me in last night,” Harry said.
Petunia looked at him sharply. “How did you know I did that?” she asked.
Harry shrugged. “Well, Hedwig was out hunting and I’m pretty sure Uncle Vernon and Dudley wouldn’t do it, so that leaves you.”
Petunia sighed. “Yes, it was me. That’s partly why we need to talk.”
Petunia looked at him slowly. “That red-haired girl at the train station really got to me, Harry. I don’t mean she made me angry, but I mean that she drove some points home that I had not considered before. I’ve been thinking about it a lot since then, but I need to understand what she meant.”
Harry thought for a minute and then looked at her and spoke. “How much do you know about how I wound up here 15 years ago? It starts there.”
“I’m not sure. Wait here a second, I’ll be right back.” She got up and left the room, and returned a minute later with a piece of parchment. “You should read this,” she said, handing it to him.
He took it and read.
Mrs. Dursley,
It is with sadness that I must report to you the death of your sister and her husband. They died at the hands of the worst wizard in modern history, but somehow their son Harry survived and Lord Voldemort was apparently destroyed. You see Harry here before you in this basket.
It was intended that if something happened to James and Lily that Harry was to go to his godfather to live, but other circumstances have made that impossible. So I am forced to leave him with you. I hope that you can raise him as your own.
I must warn you though, that there is danger for you and him. Lord Voldemort’s followers are still on the loose, and they will be out for revenge on Harry as well as his relatives. That means your family is in danger as well. I cannot emphasize enough that you taking him in will protect all of you. All of your lives literally hang in the balance.
However, because of the circumstances of Lily’s death, if you take him in and keep him here, both he and you will be protected and safe until he comes of age. At that time we will need to assess the situation on how to proceed. Treat him well, as if he were your own son.
Yours,
Albus Dumbledore
Harry looked up. “Well, you know part of what this refers to from when Dumbledore spoke to you here last year.”
“Yes, Harry, and I know that we’ve treated you horribly over the years and I’m so sorry. I was dominated by Vernon all these years like a fool. I thought…” Her voice broke and she burst into tears. “I thought that by leaving the wizarding world and marrying a Muggle that I could escape it all—the petty jealousy I had of Lily, that creepy Severus boy who kept hanging around…I thought that if I escaped it I could be happy and normal. I hated your world with a passion because Lily was a part of it and I couldn’t be!”
“Wait a second, back up! ‘That creepy Severus boy?’” Harry asked in shock. He hadn’t expected any of this at all, but this revelation took the cake. In Grimmauld Place Lupin and Ginny looked at each other, both stunned. Tonks, listening intently in the corner, was just as shocked.
“Yes, he had a thing for Lily and he was always hanging around her for a long time, years even, and they were good friends. Then those owl letters showed up for them and they both went off to school…and I was stuck at home!” she completed bitterly.
Understanding dawned on Harry’s face. Snape fancied Mum??? “That explains a lot, Aunt Petunia. Severus Snape is, well, was, a professor at Hog-…at my school. He has hated me from day one, even worse than Uncle Vernon. I think now I know why—he loved Mum and she wound up with Dad instead, and he never forgave them, and took it out on me.” Harry looked at her. “I think I need to tell you what I know about the night I wound up here. Some of it I vaguely remember, but some of it was told to me second- and third-hand.”
Harry took a deep breath and started in, deciding to not directly mention the prophecy. “Lord Voldemort had decided to kill us because he saw Mum and Dad as a threat to him. Mum and Dad heard of it and went into hiding, but they were betrayed by Peter Pettigrew, one of their school friends, and Peter framed Sirius, my godfather, and another of their school friends, for the betrayal, as well as the death of a dozen Muggles. Sirius went to the wizarding prison without a trial for fourteen years. He escaped after discovering that Peter was still alive and living as a rat with my best mate’s family, found me, and we discovered the truth and got Sirius into hiding. That is, until last year, when he was killed trying to save me from Voldemort’s followers.” Harry paused, wincing at the memory and the loss, but then continued. “Back to that night, Voldemort first killed Dad and then found Mum defending me. She took a Killing Curse for me, and that sacrifice protected me. Voldemort tried to kill me in the same way, but the curse rebounded on him, and severed his spirit from his body. The house blew apart in the process, destroying his body. I survived. Sirius arrived and got me out of there, gave me and his motorcycle to Hagrid, and he took off after Peter. Hagrid brought me on the bike here to Privet Drive where Dumbledore and McGonagall were waiting for me. They put me in the basket, and Dumbledore wrote you that note, put up the enchantments, and left.”
“That’s why you didn’t wind up with your godfather, then?” Petunia asked, dabbing at her tears. “That explains a lot, but what’s with the protection part? Can you explain that?”
“Well, the way Dumbledore explained it to me, because you and I are of the same blood, the protection that Mum gave me also extends to you and your family. That’s why you have been safe with me here and so have Uncle Vernon and Dudley, even though they have no clue about it. That’s why Dumbledore sent you that Howler after the Dementors attacked me and Dudley two years ago,” replied Harry, a trace of bitterness in his voice.
“I see it now,” sobbed Petunia. “Harry, I’m so sorry! I’ve been horrible all these years! I shouldn’t have tried to run away from your world, because I really couldn’t! But I don’t understand something, though. Why was Lily a witch and not me?”
“I dunno that myself, Aunt Petunia. Magic can be unpredictable in that way. Sometimes witches and wizards are born of other witches and wizards, other times they come from Muggles or mixes of the two. And sometimes witches and wizards give birth to Muggles. I think that may have been what happened here,” replied Harry. “I wish I could tell you more, but I just don’t know.”
“Can Dumbledore explain it?” asked Petunia hopefully.
At this point Harry almost broke down himself. “No, he can’t,” he replied, trying to keep his voice steady. “Dumbledore died last week. Snape killed him, and I saw it happen, and I couldn’t…I couldn’t,” Harry’s voice finally cracked. “I couldn’t do a damn thing to stop it!” Harry now broke down completely, sobbing into his own hands, and it was Petunia’s turn to watch.
Tonks fought of a tremendous urge to hug Harry and not let go, but fought it. You’ve got a job to do, Nymphadora! But she did not stop her own silent tears. At Grimmauld Place, Ginny was crying with him as well, and Lupin held her, tears streaming down his own face.
Suddenly there was a loud crack and burst of flame. Fawkes apparated into Harry’s room, holding a letter and a package. He dropped them both on the bed, landed on Harry’s shoulder, glanced meaningfully at Tonks, and began to sing. Petunia watched in astonishment and fascination as the song penetrated them all and lifted their spirits, even Lupin and Ginny who heard it through the coins. When he finished, Harry lifted his eyes and looked at the phoenix, who regarded him with a wise look. “Thank you, Fawkes,” he whispered. He got a squeeze on his shoulder in reply, then Fawkes flew over and landed on the desk.
“Harry, what is that?” asked Petunia, pointing at Fawkes.
“That’s Dumbledore’s phoenix,” Harry replied, getting up and going over to the bed. His opened the parchment first and recognized McGonagall’s handwriting. He read it aloud.
Dear Harry,
Fawkes appeared in my office with your Invisibility Cloak and a letter from Dumbledore. It seems that Albus decreed that should he die, Fawkes would become yours. I would recommend using him or your Patronus for communication for now, as the owls are being intercepted, the Floo Network is being watched, as are the Portkeys, and all apparations.
We all miss him, Harry.
Minerva McGonagall
Harry unwrapped the parcel and found his Invisibility Cloak. He had forgotten he had left it on the Astronomy Tower. He gulped. He hoped Hedwig was all right. Just then she soared in the window and into her cage, where she let out a small hoot and promptly went to sleep. Harry sighed in relief.
At Grimmauld Place, Lupin looked at Ginny. It’s a good thing Hermione came up with these coins now! he wrote on a piece of parchment. Ginny nodded. At Privet Drive, Harry and Tonks were both thinking the same thing, but neither knew it.
“So what happens now, Harry?” Petunia asked, more than a little shaky.
Harry ran his fingers through his mop of hair and paced around the room. “Well, I need to stay here to July 31st to maximize the rest of the protections, that much is certain. After that, the wards lift, and everyone here is exposed and in danger again. That leaves a few options. The simple one is we do nothing and hope that Voldemort ignores you while looking for me. I don’t like that idea because it’s not likely he’ll ignore you and taking that risk means you lot will be killed, so we rule that one out. There is a second option, which is you go into hiding under a Fidelius Charm. It’s not perfect, but it is safer. The third option is you go on the run. But that just exposes you. Hermione is getting her parents out of the country…” He stopped pacing and speaking as an idea popped into his head. “Wait a minute…”
He looked up, a smile on his face. “I have an idea. You lot need a long vacation. How about you tour America, in a motor home? We can put the motor home under the Fidelius Charm, you can see the country at your leisure, safely, and when this is all over I’ll send for you to come back.”
“But what about the cost, Harry? We can’t afford that!” objected Petunia.
“I certainly can. Remember, the Potters were loaded, and so am I. I’ll pay for it all. It’s worth it to get you lot to safety.” Harry rummaged around his trunk and found a piece of blank parchment and a quill. “I need to write Bill.”
Bill,
I need a big favor, quick. Get into my vault at Gringotts and withdraw for me enough Galleons to make up £1,000,000. Have the bank convert all of it to U.S. Muggle dollars, then set it up in a special account in America. Then send either Fred or George here to Privet Drive ASAP so I can talk to them. I’d prefer Hermione, but she’s out of the country.
Yours,
Harry
P.S. Don’t tell anyone.
Harry rolled up the parchment and went over to Fawkes. “Can you get this to Bill Weasley, and then wait for the reply?” Fawkes took the roll in one talon and nodded, then disapparated in a flaming crack. Hedwig slept on.
“OK, when he gets back, we’re going to get you all out of here and over to America to do this. That way, you’ll be safe. Tell Uncle Vernon you won it as a prize on some call-in show on the tube. He’ll only go for it if he doesn’t know it came from me. My friends and I will do the rest.” Harry looked directly at her. “Make the money last. The motor home will be paid for, so all expenses are your fuel, food, and whatever entertainment you decide to do, but please be nondescript about it. If you draw attention to yourself you’ll just put yourself at risk. If there’s a problem we’ll have a way for you to contact us.”
“Harry, why are you doing this? Why, after all we’ve done to you, are you being so generous?” sobbed Petunia.
Harry thought about it before replying. “If I can prevent some more deaths, then it’s worth it. Too many people have died for me or because of me. Now listen, you three will need to get your Muggle travel arrangements arranged to get to America, but I’ll be paying for it. You’ll need the paperwork done yourself. Play your part, Aunt Petunia; it’s important to make this work.”
She nodded.
* * *
I knew there was plenty of reasons I loved Harry Potter, thought Ginny. Despite all they did to him, he still cares enough to do this to protect them! This is just another reason.
Ginny wrote on the parchment, We don’t say anything either. Lupin nodded and wrote, If the Fidelius Charm is on the coach then knowing the plan won’t reveal anything, but we will need to figure out a way to protect them as well. Ginny wrote, Multiple Fidelius Charms? Lupin wrote, Brilliant!
* * *
They talked on Harry’s school years and eventually Vernon and Dudley came home. Petunia went downstairs and reverted to her snappish manner again, but Harry knew now it was an act, and he played along.
Fawkes returned with a note from Bill. A pair of “pops” shortly thereafter announced the arrival of both Fred and George. Harry quickly filled them in on what he wanted: He needed them to go to America and find a motor coach for the Dursleys, come back, and then they could make the trip back to buy it and set it all up. Delighted, the twins left at once.
Tonks turned off her coin and re-illusioned herself. “Harry, that was extremely nice of you. How you could stand their treatment all those years and still do that is beyond me. I am so proud of you!” She walked over and gave him a kiss on the cheek and a hug worthy of Mrs. Weasley.
“You realize that you need to be sworn to secrecy on this also. If you get captured Voldemort can pull this out of your head and they’d be at risk.” pointed out Harry.
“Yes, I know. That just means I’ll have to be there on the charming,” replied Tonks.
Harry sat down with a sigh. “I hope this works.”
“It will, Harry. A mobile Fidelius Charm is brilliant!” replied Tonks. Then she turned serious. She flicked her wand twice, locking the door and adding a silencing charm. “Now we need to talk.”
Harry looked at her, thinking he knew what was coming. Before he could say anything, Tonks, thought, How do I do this? Ah, to bloody Hell with it! and plunged ahead.
“Harry, I know you and Ginny were dating this year, and I know you two were so happy with each other. But on the train you two barely spoke to each other, and I don’t know if you caught the whole gist of what she was saying to the Dursleys when she ripped them new ones.” Harry laughed at the reference, remembering the names she called both Uncle Vernon and Dudley.
“OK, Tonks, what was she saying? I take it there was more besides making the three of them afraid of the famous Weasley temper?” Harry asked lightly.
“You could say that. What she was saying without words was that she loves you and doesn’t want to see anything happen to you. Then she snogged you senseless to prove the point.”
Harry looked at her. “I can’t expose her to Voldemort, though, Tonks! It’s bad enough that he’s after me! I’ve already lost my parents, Sirius, and now Dumbledore! I-I...” Harry broke down sobbing. “I don’t want to lose the only girl I truly love, too!”
Tonks moved over and wrapped her arms around him. “Harry, Ginny became exposed to You-Know-Who in the Chamber of Secrets, four years ago. It happened not because of who you are, but because of who she is—a blood-traitor Weasley. You saved her then, Harry, and you did it with a courage and bravery far beyond your years. You can do it again if you need to. I know it, Remus knows it, Hermione knows it, her family knows it, and most of all, she knows it. Do you truly love her, Harry?” She felt him nod. “Then you know it, too. A wise man once said, ‘The way to love anything is to realize that it might be lost.’* You get that already, Harry. You won’t lose her if you don’t have her in the first place. She loves you and needs you, and you her. Tell me: are you happier with her or apart?”
Harry mumbled, “With her. I hate the times we’re apart. I hated breaking up with her at Dumbledore’s funeral! It’s my fault, too!” he sobbed.
“Why, Harry, why was it your fault?”
“Because I was an utter fool!” he wailed, completely broken now. “Dumbledore told me my ability to love was what set me apart from Voldemort, and what gave me the power to defeat him, and I threw it away like a complete idiot!”
“You didn’t throw it all away, Harry. The fact you’re like this right now means you didn’t. You love her and want to be with her so much that it’s broken you down completely here, and it’s your fear that is stopping you! If you’re going to get past your fear, if you’re going to defeat You-Know-Who, then you need all the love you can get. And that starts with your true love, Ginny.” Tonks took his head in her hands and turned his tear-covered face to hers. “Harry, you two were as meant for each other as much as Lily and James were. Ginny knows it, and deep down I think you know it. That type of love is special to have and precious to hold. Embrace it, live in it, and make it yours. Part of being ‘The Boy Who Lived’ is also being ‘The Boy Who Loved.’ A life without love is no life at all—ask You-Know-Who. Go to her, Harry, and tell her. Love her, help her, let her love you, and let her help you.”
“I’m not sure how to let her in and not shut her out…” whispered Harry.
“You’ll know. Trust your heart, not your head on this one, Harry.”
“I can’t leave here until July 31st, and that’s two weeks!”
“You will, because you have a motor home to organize in America, remember?” chided Tonks. “So for now, send her a love letter. I’ll help if you want.”
“I’ll do that, Tonks, but I think I need to do that alone.”
Little did he realize what was in that parchment that couldn’t be opened yet!
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*G.K. Chesterton
