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How do you get a one-armed blonde out of a tree?
Wave to her .
How do you get a blondes eyes to twinkle?
Shine a torch in her ears .
How do you drown a blond?
Put a mirror at the bottom of the pool .
What's a blonde's idea of safe sex?
Locking the car door .
Why is it okay for blondes to catch cold?
They don't have to worry about blowing their brains out .
What's the difference between a counterfeit dollar and a skinny blonde?
One's a phony buck.
How do you tell if a blonde did your landscaping?
The bushes are darker than the rest of the yard .
How do you describe a blonde, surrounded by drooling idiots?
Flattered .
Why did the blonde keep failing her driver's test?
Because every time the door opened, she jumped into the back seat .
What is the best blonde secretary in the world to have?
One that never misses a period .
What is every blonde's ambition in life?
To be like Vanna White and learn the alphabet.
What can save a dying blonde?
Hair transplants.
What are the worst six years in a blonde's life?
Third Grade .
What did the blonde say about blonde jokes?
She said they were pretty good, but they might offend some Puerto Ricans .
What's the disease that paralyzes blondes below the waist?
Marriage .
What's six inches long, has a bald head, and drives blondes crazy?
A hundred dollar bill .
How does a blonde interpret 6.9?
A 69 interrupted by a period .
